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APOLOGY TO THE
PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA
It is with deep regret, hesitation, and contrition that I, The President
of the United States of America, offer apology to the Chinese nation
and its peoples. I apologize for the heinous act performed by our large,
sluggish, propeller driven, airplane when it got in the way of your
highly maneuverable, supersonic, technologically superior, jet aircraft.
Furthermore, I sincerely regret the fact that by flying in international
airspace, we afforded your "highly competent" pilot the opportunity
to fly his aircraft into our own, causing him to spiral to his death
into the ocean. We regret the choice made by said pilot when he used
deficient judgment in electing to attempt aerial intimidation upon our
slower moving, unarmed, surveillance vehicle. This situation brings
to mind a similar episode when I was in grade school and my face got
in the way of the school yard bully's fist. He broke a bone in his hand
and I felt as compelled to apologize for that incident as I do for this
one. Let me summarize by stating that it is our sincere hope that you
accept this "heart felt" and "sincere" apology for the actions committed
by your pilot. We are sorry that we got in the way. We are sorry that
we were forced to leave international airspace and land in Chinese territory.
We are sorry that you were forced to provide food and housing for our
military personnel.
Most of all, we are sorry that you have, in your possession, some of
our most technologically advanced surveillance equipment on the planet.
I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive us. I am thankful
you have been compelled to release our men and our property.
Because I really don't want to have to apologize again when we have
to kick your ass.
Sincerely,
George W. Bush
President of the United States
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